Dreams To Do

The Making of Baby #3

Ok, maybe this post title isn’t quite right. Obviously you can probably figure out how this baby in my belly was made. But I want to tell the story of how I found out I was pregnant with this little one and how we got there. I learned a lot about myself in the process and maybe some day one of you will find this info helpful when you’re ready to make a baby. Warning: TMI???

With my son and my daughter I was spoiled. I hate bragging about this because I have many friends and loved ones who have struggled with infertility, but with both of my children I got pregnant on the first try. Literally, the hubby and I would decide to start trying and the next month I would get a positive pregnancy test. Totally spoiled. With Leila (my firstborn), this floored me. I expected we would try for 6 months before getting her. Nope. With Landon, I expected we’d at least have to try for a few months since we were so lucky with Leila. Nope. I guess I’m just fertile.

With baby #3, it was different. Never in my life have I tracked my cycles or given any thought to when I ovulate. For some reason when we decided to start trying for #3 I felt compelled to start charting. I had several friends who had done it and I thought it would be an interesting way of learning about my body. Little did I know it would become a bit of an obsession and something that would drive me a little bit batty.

If you aren’t familiar with charting your cycles, basically it gives you a pretty accurate idea of when you ovulate so that you make sure to have sex at the ideal time to conceive a baby. You take your basal body temperature (your body’s lowest resting temp) right upon waking up at the same time each day and record it (I used the Kindara iPhone app which I highly recommend). You also make note of your cervical mucous consistancy each day (gross, I know). After ovulation, you should see a sharp rise in your temp and a change in the consistency of your cervical mucous. If you are interested in learning more about this, check out this run-down.

So, in July we decided we were ready to try and shortly after I started charting. The average cycle length for a woman is 28 days and most women ovulate around day 15 or about half way through their cycle. However, what I learned through charting is that 1) I have ridiculously long cycles (35 days!) and 2) I don’t ovulate until around day 21 of my cycle. What this means is that I have to wait longer than most women to conceive and then find out I’m pregnant. Boo.

After three months of charting and no pregnancy yet I started to obsess about it a little. When you chart, you wake up each morning taking your temp and waiting to see that temperature spike that tells you you’ve ovulated. Then, after ovulation there’s the dreaded 2-week wait to either find out you’re pregnant or start the whole process all over again. So basically, you are thinking about getting pregnant all the time. With my other two kiddos I never felt any pressure to get pregnant and I never even gave a second thought to ovulation. With this one it was different. It almost became a game. I decided that after 3 months of charting I would stop. I didn’t want to obsess about it any more.

So, after my third month of charting and trying to conceive, I started my period. My heart hurt. Unless you have actively tried for a baby and known this let down, you probably don’t understand the sadness you can feel. I treated myself to a milkshake and pizza and felt better. My hubby brought me home flowers from work when I told him I was sad (I know, I know 3 months of trying is NOTHING!). Two days later my period had stopped. I thought that was odd since it normally lasts at least 4-5 days. I continued to take my temp even though I said I would stop after this cycle (I was addicted)Β and I’m so glad I did. You see, normally when you start your period you see a drop in your basal body temp. However, I never saw this drop. Two days after my “period” ended my temp was still at a post-ovulation high temperature. On Tuesday, October 29, 2013 I woke up and took a spontaneous pregnancy test even though I had just finished my period. I did it on a fluke because I found it odd that my temps were still high. I never had my hopes up and I never expected a positive. But, there it was.

I have never been in such shock over a pregnancy test. I never had any bleeding with either of my other pregnancies. I also had never experienced spending any time invested in really trying to conceive. I started to shake and cry uncontrollably. I yelled for my sleeping husband to wake up and come here. I still remember Andy stumbling out of bed and tripping into the wall out of frantic panic over what he would find. I showed him the test and he just stared at it confused and stared at me sobbing before asking what’s going on. I’M PREGNANT!! The poor guy was SO confused. It was a very special, awesome moment.

So, what I learned from the making of baby #3:

  • I don’t ever want to try to have another baby.
  • Charting your cycles is an amazing thing – it really is accurate and I really do believe it helped us conceive.
  • I will never chart my cycles again. While I think it’s amazing, it just created a lot of added stress for me.
  • You CAN have a period and still be pregnant! (or what you would think is a period anyway, it’s actually implantation bleeding from the baby attaching to your uterus!)
  • I was induced with both Leila and Landon a week past my due dates, but the due dates weren’t accurate. My doc always based the due date on the start of my last period, but since I have long cycles and ovulate so late I should have been due a week later. This time I told him all of this up front and we adjusted my due date accordingly. After all, I know the exact day I conceived this time! Maybe I’ll actually experience going into labor on my own this time.

All in all, I’m just so happy to be pregnant with my next little bundle of joy!

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  • Kelly Welsh

    Loved reading this!!

  • Melissa @ Completely Eclipsed

    Awww so sweet. I’m so happy for you. I charted with Isabella and I had an obsessive love/hate for it. It fueled my need for control but stressed me out to the max. It took me 4 cycles to get pregnant with her. With my other two pregnancies I got knocked up on the first try. So I’m just like you only backwards πŸ˜‰

    • See, I think charting just creates more stress and makes the process take longer! But, it was kind of a little tiny bit fun to try it out. Never again though! Ha!

  • I never did any kind of charting with my first two, but with the third, I did to a certain extent. I didn’t take my temp, but I checked CM every day and tracked that way. I was obsessive, but only because I HAD to have a girl. I was on a “girl diet” and timed sex accordingly for a girl. Conceiving her was a LOT more stressful than with the boys for that reason. But each time, we got pregnant within the first three months so we got lucky as well. But even so, each negative test when you’re trying (no matter how long, IMO) is a mini heartbreak.

    • If I didn’t get my girl and my boy I TOTALLY would have tried all the gender techniques. I’m actually going to write a post on that for Daily Mom soon! πŸ™‚ I’m so, so glad that it worked out for you and you got your princess. πŸ™‚

  • Once again, I relate to this SO MUCH! never had to try until this one! It took 3 months, which is a VERY long time for me. I also charted with Kindara. I thought I wanted that experience of actively trying. WRONG. It totally stressed me out – I mean, I have anxiety already. It totally put a strain on our relationship. And I got the positive after a cycle that I decided would be the last. That maybe I wasn’t meant to have another baby. I totally did not think I was pregnant. We had only tried one night during that cycle and it wasn’t on a peak day. SURPRISE!

    • We are the same! 3 months felt like FOREVER and I felt guilty getting upset over it taking so “long” when I had friends who tried for months and months with no luck. Charting totally stressed me out, too. Probably why it took as long as it did. Ha!

  • Courtney @ One Fine Wire

    What a great story that I know so many people can relate to. This pregnancy was very different for us too, the process almost four months long. So stressful! We are both so blessed πŸ™‚

  • As you know, it took us quite a while (but still nothing compared to many) to conceive both Lids (18 months of trying) and now baby #2 (9 months of trying) so I am very familiar with charting… and how crazy it can make you feel!! πŸ˜‰ I have super long cycles.. anywhere from 35 to 60+ days so it would have been tough to do it without charting and knowing when I ovulated. But you are right, it is important to know cycle length to know the babies due date. With both Lids and this baby, we knew/know the exact date they were conceived so therefore know the due date, but if the doctor was to go by first day of last period it would be WAY off. And wow, how crazy that you had what you thought was your period, then found out you were pregnant. What a great surprise in the end! πŸ™‚ So glad you have your #3 on the way and your family will be complete!