Hello! Happy spring! Okay, maybe it isn’t technically spring just yet, but with the extra hour of daylight and our very spring-like weather the past few days, I am feeling oh-so-happy and springy! One week ago we got dumped with like 6 inches of snow and it really brought me down. However, some high temps and some rain have totally melted all of the snow! YAY! And the 60 degree temps yesterday meant that I got to take my weekly belly pics outside while my kiddos frolicked in the backyard. Seriously, the weather can make such a difference in my mood!
This sweatshirt may not be the best for showing off the bump, but I was just in a sweatshirt and messy bun kinda mood yesterday.
23 week tid bits…
- I’ve gained a whopping 20 pounds already! Whoa!
- I had an ultrasound on Friday and baby boy is doing great! His kidney is still quite large, but it hasn’t grown any since the last ultrasound, which is good news. Also, he appears to be urinating just fine and his bladder is a normal size, so that is also good news.
- I’m falling more and more in love with him each and every day.
- I am officially back to my coffee drinking ways. Craving it pretty much every day now, but plain ole black coffee just won’t do. I’m all about the iced lattes and frappacinos these days. Ouch, my wallet.
- Suffering from a bit of pregnancy insomnia around 2 or 3am most nights. I wake up and just can’t get my mind to settle back down. It’s really annoying because when I finally do have to get up for the day, I don’t want to.
- Besides a nasty cold that I’ve been battling for over a week now, I feel great! This is my favorite time in pregnancy.
Here are some cute (and kinda creepy) pics from my recent ultrasound. Obviously the quality is crap because I just took pics with my cell phone. I love how we were able to see his whole body curled up in a little ball! And I was able to count 10 fingers and 10 toes!
In other news, I successfully survived 3 nights without my hubby and the kids and I actually had so much fun! It wasn’t nearly as bad as I thought it would be. To reward myself, I took the week off work to do some nesting. I’m painting our bed blue right now (the primer is drying) and I’m going to do some serious de-cluttering of the entire house. I will also be working on getting Leila’s new bedroom set up and Landon transitioned out of the crib this week. So, should be a very productive week for me!
And finally, a little blast from the past…
Hope you had a wonderful weekend and have a fantastic week ahead!
Sometimes the days drag on. Sometimes one bad thing seems to happen after another until you reach a point where you feel like you just can’t take any more. You just want to throw in the towel, crawl in a hole, hide. And then like the flip of a coin, the clouds part and the sun comes out. God knows how much you can handle. And if we didn’t have those lowest of lows, we wouldn’t truly appreciate all of the highs.
It’s funny because after my last slightly depressing post, written when I was feeling a little down in the dumps, I slept it off. I woke up to sunshine and warmer weather. The snow was melting. I treated myself to a Starbucks vanilla latte on the way to work. Andy let me drive his sporty new car. Ever since that morning, I’ve been blessed with nothing but a series of happy moments. While I was dreading my husbands departure for a few days, I am seriously soaking up this uninterrupted one-on-one time with my children. We’ve been out for ice-cream, shopping at the mall, on a walk to the park. We’ve enjoyed a delivery pizza picnic in front of the TV, jumping in piles of laundry, and lots of giggles. I feel refreshed. I feel the love from my kids and I know in this moment, life is good. I’m thankful for the change in weather, the change in my attitude, and I’m thankful for the tough times because they make days like today feel that much better.
Pregnancy brain. Laziness. Stress. Lack of motivation. I have a list of things I want to write about and do written in the back of my planner, but I can’t seem to do anything about it. Instead, I’m sinking into the couch, spacing out on HGTV. It’s moments like these when I start beating myself up. I should be doing more! And then I grab my phone and scan through Instagram and Facebook and it just makes me feel worse. Oy.
I apologize for the negative tone of my blog lately (with the exception of my weekly pregnancy updates). I’ve been pretty distant from blogging, which makes me sad. I’ve been in a bit of a dark place, which is also disturbing. I’m not one to pretend everything is all sunshine and roses when it isn’t. I’d rather just write what I feel or not write at all. Maybe that’s why I’ve hardly been posting lately.
All of this is to say that I’m still looking towards the future longingly and with excitement and holding on to a lot of hope. Hope for all the little things.
Hope that I can survive the next few days without my hubby’s help.
Hope that my ultrasound on Friday shows a healthy baby.
Hope that I can successfully paint our bed and get our house back in shape next week.
Hope that Landon will transition from the crib easily and that Leila will learn to keep her new room clean.
Hope that I will re-discover my creative spark.
Hope that I can take all of my ideas and run with them instead of hold them back in fear.
Hope that I will stop being such a stress case.
Hope that I will learn to live with not having all the answers.
Holy moly, what a weekend! I’m fighting quite the head/chest cold that pretty much knocked me on my ass Friday (along with my sweet little boy who wanted me to hold him ALL DAY) and on top of that, we got a fresh dumping of snow. Have I mentioned that I am SO over winter? Seriously! I am dying for some warm weather and green. Sure, the snow is pretty when it first hits, but soon enough it’s a brown mushy mess. Over it.
On a happier note, I’m 22 weeks along now and feeling great in terms of my pregnancy!
Not quite sure what’s going on with the crotch of my pants. I think this is what happens when your belly is big and your non-pregnancy pants will only go up so far. I’ll have to keep this in mind. Ha!
Pregnancy happenings at 22 weeks…
- Leila Jade felt baby boy kick for the first time last Thursday night! She was on the floor doing a puzzle while I watched TV and the baby was going crazy, so I told her to come feel my belly. What do ya know, the little bugger gave her a good hard kick which resulted in lots of giggles and tears in my eyes. Such a special moment.
- Besides this nasty cold which I really can’t do anything about, I’m feeling great! Sleep is wonderful and I have a decent amount of energy during the day. Headaches have also subsided, which I was getting fairly frequently (knock on wood).
- Currently craving BBQ potato chips with ranch. Still haven’t gotten my hands on any, though.
- Definitely falling into some lazy preggo lady ways – watching way too much TV lately and having my family dote on me whenever possible. Hey, gotta take advantage of it while I can.
- Still clueless as to what we’re gonna name this little guy. Like, we haven’t even started thinking about it.
- Dreading this next weekend when my hubby leaves me for a 4-day boys trip. God grant me strength.
And now for a little flashback fun…
Relief. It’s 5:25pm and I’ve successfully survived the morning chaos, daycare drop off, work, and daycare pick up. We park on the street in front of our house and I take a deep breath. Such a relief to be home. My shoes and pants are begging to be ripped off in exchange for bare feet and sweats. But first, I must unload my crew. First Leila who goes running into the house through the open garage to greet an excited Billy-dog, and then my little Lando who always covers his eyes and pretends to hide from me when I go to unbuckle him.
With purse, keys, backpack, lunch bag, blankie, and school artwork overflowing from my arms, we schlepp into the basement and up the stairs to the kitchen where I unload all of it in a pile on the floor. Shoes are pulled off, coats are thrown aside and we all race upstairs to immediately put jammies on. Once comfortable, it’s dinner prep (never planned, always thrown together at the last minute) while kiddos play at my feet, chow time, and then baths. Clean couch snuggles with milk and a snack and maybe some Caillou or Pajanimals usually tops off my evenings at home alone with my littles.
This is my time to shine. While I find myself exhausted and craving peace and relaxation immediately upon leaving the office, it’s not what I get. Not right away anyway. Instead I get something even better. I get my chaotic, yet predictable evening routine with two little people who carry my heart outside of my body. It’s so easy to take this for granted. Sometimes I just want bedtime to magically appear so I can chill. Sometimes the neediness and the mess and the movement almost sends me over the edge. But usually, I cherish these few hours unwinding together in the evenings. I want to remember this.
I’ve been a bit of a mess lately. The hormones in this pregancy are out of control – more so than I ever remember. I feel down a lot of the time, especially when I’m away from my family. I don’t know what it is, but it’s out of my control. I’m normally a very happy-shiny person, or I like to think I am, so it’s all very strange. All I want to do lately is be home with my people in our little bubble of love. I think this is why I’m cherishing my evenings with my kiddos so much more lately.
I read Diana’s blog post from today and it killed me. If you aren’t familiar with her story, she lost her twin sons who were born prematurely a couple of years ago and then just 6 months ago, her third son passed away from a rare heart condition and virus when he was just a few weeks old. I made the mistake of reading this post while I was at work and I couldn’t hold back the tears. My heart hasn’t stopped breaking for her since she lost her twins and every time I read her writing it reminds me just how blessed I am – that I have two (almost three) precious, healthy, joyful children. Diana’s daughter doesn’t get to play with her brothers like Leila gets to play with hers. Life is so unfair. And yet, in a sickening way other people’s pain can remind us to be happy – to cherish all that we have.